belief makes things real

I have been accepted into the American Musical and Dramatic Academy in New York City! And on top of that, I earned a national merit scholarship that will cover half of the cost of my tuition! It goes without saying, but life is good!

I had a dream a few days before my audition for AMDA where I received a letter of congratulations on my acceptance, as well as an award letter for a large scholarship. I've always been told that the way to achieve a goal is to visualize yourself doing so. I suppose that's what the dream was. It certainly allowed me to remain calm during the auditions process. Though, the rational side of me took over, reminding myself that regardless of whether or not I am accepted, life goes on. And because performing is so much a part of who I am, I also knew that it was something I would keep doing on my own. I told myself, "If it's meant to happen, it will happen."

This proves to me that this is something I am supposed to do. Upon hearing about my acceptance, I had the exact same reaction as when I received my acceptance to Berkeley - I burst into tears. I had wanted this, just like I had wanted Berkeley, for so long. It was a relief and a thrill. But unlike Berkeley, I was awarded a scholarship, and a merit scholarship at that. This school believes in my talent so much that they are willing to give me thousands of dollars to help me become the person I have always dreamed of being. I feel so incredibly justified in the longing I've had all these years.

I believe in myself more than I ever have before, and I know that that simple fact will take me far. I can't wait to begin this incredible journey. My life has just changed for the better.

...

a way back to then // [title of show]

Dancing in the backyard
Kool-Aid mustache and butterfly wings
Hearing Andrea McArdle sing from the hi-fi in the den
I've been waiting my whole life to find a way back to then

I aimed for the sky
A nine-year-old can see so far
I'll conquer the world and be a star, I'll do it all by the time I'm ten
I would know that confidence if I knew a way back to then

So I bailed on my hometown
And became a college theatre dork
I was east-bound and down, moving to New York
So I crammed my life in a U-Haul to find my part of it all

But the mundane sets in
We play by the rules and plow through the days
The years take us miles away from the time we wondered when
We'd find a way back to then

And when you least expect
Opportunity walks through the door
You suddenly connect with the thing that you forgot
That you've been looking for

And there you are
Right in the middle of what you love
With the craziest of company
You're having a kick ass time
And being who you wanted to be in this world
You're that little girl with her wings unfurled
Flying again

Back in the backyard dancing
I found a way back to then